It's no secret that Sony not only loves innovation, but worships it on an almost religious level. The PS5 - a device that looks more like a futuristic spaceship than a console - has taken the world by storm. But who doesn't know it? Sony wouldn't be Sony if they didn't keep taking the next step.
While the world continues to discuss the various Shortcomings of the Nintendo Switch 2 and the PlayStation Portal is quietly disappearing into the annals of electronics history, another revolutionary device is just around the corner. Fans may ask themselves: "What could be more awesome than the PS5?" Well, the answer is surprising - and yet not really: A much speculated PS5 handheldwhich offers the best of the PS5 in a miniature version. Sure, it's only "sort of" similar to the PS5, but still - almost. Welcome to the new PlayStation (5) Portable.
Note: This text is a humorous look at the world of gaming - don't take it seriously unless you're a console fanatic looking for the next fierce debate!
The PS5 as a handheld - in miniature!
Sony has decided to adopt the Nintendo Switch 2 concept directly. And why not? After all, it's a proven concept that works "okay" at best. So what do we have? A PS5 that now almost fits in the palm of your hand - and I emphasize almost. Of course, the performance isn't quite what you'd expect from a real PS5, but who cares about details like FPS? It runs "smoothly enough". Anyone who really gets hung up on a jerky frame is probably a games journalist anyway, who pays far too much attention to facts and figures.
There are many things that are "almost" as good as in the big version. For example, the graphics, which of course can't quite keep up with the PS5. So for all those who never really wanted to go into technical depth, they can sit back and enjoy "next-gen" experiences - well, almost. Sure, the graphics aren't like on the PS5, but with an optimized (read: less detailed) look, the experience becomes all the more "authentic" - almost as if you were playing with a successor to a pixel artwork.
The new GameCard
Anyone who likes innovative storage media will be delighted with Sony's brand new GameCard format. Although this makes the games a little more expensive, the appearance of physical presence must be maintained. But hey, new means better, right? At least that's how it's sold. However, the real fun starts when you download the games. Sony likes to celebrate the digital revolution - and for the convenience of a large storage space, you can finally take this big step into the age of downloads. After all, the future of gaming is buying physical media and then downloading everything online - isn't that the perfect metaphor for progress?
But don't worry, the convenient voucher code is included in every game package - after all, it should remain an exclusive experience that will fill the bits and bytes of your handheld. Necessary memory cards are of course not included, because after a lot of overcoming, Sony leaves this decision up to the customer for once.
Joy-Sense Controller - the return of "real" technology
Who needs the "modern" technology of reverb effect sticks when you can just use the analog joysticks from the golden age of the PlayStation era? Sure, they never really lasted long and had to be replaced regularly, but why bother with these newfangled innovations? Sony proves once again that true innovation doesn't always mean improving things. Sometimes it's enough to just leave everything as it was and sell it as something "nostalgic".
After all, the detachable controllers are a masterpiece of innovation and can be replaced regularly, ensuring a healthy side income. Why bother with expensive and less maintainable technology when you can just keep buying new Joy Sense controllers? Yes, that's right - the actual controllers are detachable, but only so you can replace it. A great idea from the competition and functional. Buying spare parts has never been so 'innovative' - or, as the financial geniuses call it: Mischkalkulation. Because at the end of the day, only one thing counts: the money will come in, guaranteed, no matter what!
Accessories and subscriptions: the true heroes of the game
Of course, Sony cannot afford to sell the handheld console alone. The real cash cow comes in the form of accessories and premium subscriptions. Cameras, docking station (something like a stationary PS5 - wait a minute?) and Pro versions of Joy Sense controllers - all of which are not only practical, but also ensure that the cash registers are ringing before the device is even on the market. Accessories are the true future of gaming - and with this handheld, it's no coincidence that the price is only half of the overall experience.
If you are still hesitating about all these innovations, you may be surprised by the equally revolutionary virtual demo be convinced. Let's affectionately call it the 'Welcome Tour' - that sounds much friendlier than 'paid demo'. And if that's still not reason enough to spend your money: the new Share-Button+ is waiting for you. Inconspicuous at first glance, it only reveals its true potential once an exclusive Premium subscription has been taken out. Sony calls this "rethinking communication" - we call it the world's first hardware button that refuses to work without a monthly payment. A button that not only clicks, but also collects. At last, when you press a button, you really feel like you're being asked to pay.
And that brings us to the most important point: The PlayStation Portable is not cheap, of course, and Sony is to be congratulated. After all, the company has found a whole new way to pimp the old idea of handheld consoles. A fair price of 699 euros will give you a condensed "next-gen" experience - of course, without the "next-gen" graphics, but that doesn't matter. Sony has always known that the true value of a product is not in its performance, but in its price.
So, if you think the PlayStation Portable is going to be a long time coming - don't worry. Sony is sure to delight us with the next step soon. Perhaps even with something that almost looks like the PS5. Almost. And it's in this simple ingenuity that Sony's true strength is revealed: they don't always have to be first. They simply have to be the "better" second - at least in their own perception.
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